Matt calls me his wifey. :) I like the nickname. Lately I have friends reading books about being godly wives. Our pastor just did a sermon on Proverbs 31 and I've been thinking a lot about being a wife. It seems that there is quite a bit of focus on how to be a "godly wife" in the church. I think it's been that way for a long time, because I remember my mom learning about it throughout my childhood.
Here are some of the thoughts I have been pondering...
Are we created to be helpmates for our husbands, or lovers of God? Are you asking, must it be either or? Well, the focus has to be somewhere, right? If we are focused on a quest to submit and be a helpmate for our husband, will we lose sight of resting in the Lord and being His bride? Are we just created to be His, and as we live our life in Him we will begin to walk the road of godly wifehood?
I have been raised in a family full of strong women. My sister is the first of us to be an official feminist, but for generations, the women have been fighters. I also have an exceptional husband that does not ever put any pressure or guilt on me to live up to anything in any area. I enjoy our relationship and think we are learning so much each day about how to love, respect, and serve each other. We have experienced something very interesting...the more we stop putting guilt and pressure on ourselves to "be godly," the more godly we become in our relationship. The more we trust Christ to live in us and through us, the more we see His activity in our marriage. The more we rest in Him, the more we see Him in each other. I am very thankful for him and we are enjoying exploring this discussion together. Maybe he will comment here...:)
I know that this can be a very hot topic, but I would love your input!
10 years ago
3 comments:
Hey Wifey, I really like your thoughts...
Here are some of mine that were stirred as I read your post:
I think it does have to be either/or when it comes to focus. Hebrews 12:2 is very clear about "fixing" our eyes on Jesus (which I wrote about in a comment from one of your previous posts).
As I think of the whole of Scripture, I think the recurring theme is that we were created for Him, both genders are. As we relate with Him, He relates through us with the opposite gender in specific ways.
For us to by-pass our relationship with Him in order to fulfill what we see as our spouse-ly duties, we will miss the mark.
I am sure some may think that I'm overstating things or that they aren't "by-passing" their relationship with God in order to submit to or love their spouse but rather they are just doing what God has commanded through the Scriptures.
It is true that there are roles described throughout Scripture and ways of relating to others that are right and that are wrong. However, it's all in the context of living in Christ.
Anytime our focus is off of Christ, even if it's on something godly, it's off. We were created to live totally dependent on Him and as we do so, He will live through us, accomplishing righteousness and good to others.
All that said, I'm really glad you're my wifey. :)
awe shucks...thanks matt!
I really like what you said about not putting pressure on each other to be more Godly...and seeing yourselves becoming more Godly. It is so easy to compare our spouses to other people or read a book that should be life changing for us and instead apply everything to what our spouse should be doing better. Matei (my hubby!) is so laid back. He has an abundance of patience that I have never been able to understand. He is always gentle and loving with me---seriously I can't think of more than 2 occassions in 12 years that he has even gotten close to angry. He lives out what the Bible says a Christian should be..... but due to his laid back nature... I have often been concerned (and voiced my concern) about whether or not He is leading us..... only for God to remind me HE IS LIVING IT OUT EVERYDAY--CHICK OPEN YOUR EYES! Marriage is so wonderful. It is great to read about you and Matt and be reminded that God created marriage...and in this crazy world...it still works and can be the most beautiful thing! I adore my husband too.....
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